So, you can tell its almost spring time around campus here at Eastern Washington University because all the little blonde girls are getting there pre-summer tan on! And by pre-summer tan I mean they are starting to look like oompa loompas (classic style, of course, because retro is in)!
It really is kind of shocking that ANYONE would think that being faked and baked to the point of charring your skin to a color of the rainbow would be remotely attractive or appealing. (Okay, sidetrack! Sitting in the library, about FIVE little orange girls just passed me! I hope its not something in the water...?) Seriously, I like orange juice, but not in human form. I just don't understand how someone can look in the mirror at that point and say to yourself, "Yeah. This looks good." It doesn't. Unless your a drunk frat boy who REALLY likes oranges or... traffic cones... But, as already implied, I am not in most of these girls demographic if you know what I mean. Example, I am not drunk, stupid, really attractive, or color blind.
Also! I have seen this... thing? now a few times and have meant to write about it before, but never got around to it. There is this man/woman goth that roams campus here. I honestly have NO idea what the gender is. The face is kind of mannish but also has some softer features. And the clothes are too black and baggy to notice if there are any discernible breasts.
These androgynous types scare me, to be completely honest. You don't know what you are dealing with so you are left completely vulnerable. Is it too much to ask to wear a bow in your hair perhaps? Or if you are male, TRY to have a little five o'clock shadow?
Welp, that is it for today! Thanks for reading and spread the word! Tell your friends! Until next time!
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Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Friday, February 12, 2010
Slow walkers!
Again, a month hiatus from my blog, and I apologize. I have been SUPER busy with a school this quarter and my new job (that I am loving, by the way). So, I hope to become more regular (as I have obviously said before), but I can't make any promises. BUT! I know one thing, I am here today and ready to rant!
With my increasing amount of less time (hehe..), I am starting to notice something that I noticed back in the good old days of the Freeman High School hallways. A topic on which I wrote an editorial for the school newspaper on. And though it was about "Hallway Etiquette", the same rules could easily be applied to sidewalks and pathways in an college setting.
1. When most people are walking, they generally do so with a purpose. So, that means, when you are not walking a with a purpose and are meandering along the sidewalk slower than a damn snail on a hot day, you are BLOCKING TRAFFIC! If you were a car on the road you would be pulled over for being an idiot. And it doesn't help that on large sidewalks you are always in pairs and on small sidewalks you are always a FAT ASS. Lay off the doughnuts and maybe if you walked faster than the speed of SMELL you might lose a pound!
2. If you are just STANDING there, MOVE OFF THE DAMN WALKWAY! You can stand in the grass while you grab your girlfriends ass or rifle through your backpack.
3. Don't smoke while you're walking. Your smoke goes right around and right in my face. If I wanted to die of lung cancer, I WOULD SUCK ON A FIRE STICK MYSELF!
Welp, thats it for today. Hope you enjoyed it! I have a few rants backed up, so hopefully I will get to them soon! Thanks for reading! Until next time.
With my increasing amount of less time (hehe..), I am starting to notice something that I noticed back in the good old days of the Freeman High School hallways. A topic on which I wrote an editorial for the school newspaper on. And though it was about "Hallway Etiquette", the same rules could easily be applied to sidewalks and pathways in an college setting.
1. When most people are walking, they generally do so with a purpose. So, that means, when you are not walking a with a purpose and are meandering along the sidewalk slower than a damn snail on a hot day, you are BLOCKING TRAFFIC! If you were a car on the road you would be pulled over for being an idiot. And it doesn't help that on large sidewalks you are always in pairs and on small sidewalks you are always a FAT ASS. Lay off the doughnuts and maybe if you walked faster than the speed of SMELL you might lose a pound!
2. If you are just STANDING there, MOVE OFF THE DAMN WALKWAY! You can stand in the grass while you grab your girlfriends ass or rifle through your backpack.
3. Don't smoke while you're walking. Your smoke goes right around and right in my face. If I wanted to die of lung cancer, I WOULD SUCK ON A FIRE STICK MYSELF!
Welp, thats it for today. Hope you enjoyed it! I have a few rants backed up, so hopefully I will get to them soon! Thanks for reading! Until next time.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Whores, Assholes, and Children
So, last night me and a few friends made out to dinner and a movie downtown. Dinner (Spaghetti Factory) was delicious as always (although having to pay $6 to park for an hour and a half chaps my ass every time). But then we get to the movie theatre... and thats where it all starts to go downhill.
First, I have a ticket to be refunded from seeing A Christmas Carol in 3D, the first time, when a fire alarm went off in the middle of the movie and we had to be evacuated (a water pipe had broke in the parking garage...). Obviously, I assumed I would be able to get back the full price of the ticked, which was inflated due to the 3D price. But no. They offered me one regular admittance ticket. Or she said I could get a ticket to the same movie... My question is... WHY IN THE HELL WOULD YOU OFFER ME A TICKET TO A FILM YOU ARE NOT EVEN PLAYING ANYMORE?! So, I took the $3 dollars that I would never get back up the ass like a man and walked away before I kicked the shit out of the lady monkey style.
And things only got worse in the movie of our choice for the evening (Youth in Revolt). I had to go it alone to find our seats as Sara and Carolanne both had to pee like Seabiscuit. All but two rows had people sitting dead center (and like to be dead center) so I chose the closest one to me, meaning I didn't have to climb many stairs. But once I had situated myself, I realized my fatal mistake... the row of teenage girls in front of me. And not just ANY teenage girls... dumb ones... There is nothing worse than a stupid slutty girl. Wanna know how I KNEW they were stupid and slutty? I quote "Tell him we're making out! That will make him mad!.... Oh wait... he will probably like that. HAHAHAHAHAHAH. Do it anyway!" WTF?! I kill you.
Next, Sara starts to bitch because she can't put her feet up on the chair because of the stupid slutty girls below. So we decide to move over to the endish of the row so that we can. Our feet are up there, right? There is quite a bit of seating left. Some people come in and decide, "Hey, lets sit there!" And proceed to move toward our feet chairs. They sit down. I can tell Sara is pissed beyond words. She doesn't take her feet off until the girl is sitting down completely in the seat. Needless to say, we moved up a row and turned our butt seats into our new feet seats.
Finally. This is a R rated movie. So I was shocked when a bunch of fat 6th graders waddled into the theatre. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! 6th graders?! When I was in 6th grade, I was lucky to be watching PG-13 movies, okay? My parents would have NEVER let me see one in theaters. Sure, there were a few that if they watched them and thought they were okay, I could watch them. But NEVER before they had seen them first. What is wrong with you people?! I'm sorry, but some of the stuff that happened in that movie was shocking for ME! And I have seen a lot of shit! There is no way that those kids should have been able to see that movie. They are too young. They probably think they are sex gods now, too. But they aren't. They are still just fat 6th graders with low self esteem and metabolism.
Anyway! Thats my rant for the day. Hope you enjoyed it. Come again soon!
First, I have a ticket to be refunded from seeing A Christmas Carol in 3D, the first time, when a fire alarm went off in the middle of the movie and we had to be evacuated (a water pipe had broke in the parking garage...). Obviously, I assumed I would be able to get back the full price of the ticked, which was inflated due to the 3D price. But no. They offered me one regular admittance ticket. Or she said I could get a ticket to the same movie... My question is... WHY IN THE HELL WOULD YOU OFFER ME A TICKET TO A FILM YOU ARE NOT EVEN PLAYING ANYMORE?! So, I took the $3 dollars that I would never get back up the ass like a man and walked away before I kicked the shit out of the lady monkey style.
And things only got worse in the movie of our choice for the evening (Youth in Revolt). I had to go it alone to find our seats as Sara and Carolanne both had to pee like Seabiscuit. All but two rows had people sitting dead center (and like to be dead center) so I chose the closest one to me, meaning I didn't have to climb many stairs. But once I had situated myself, I realized my fatal mistake... the row of teenage girls in front of me. And not just ANY teenage girls... dumb ones... There is nothing worse than a stupid slutty girl. Wanna know how I KNEW they were stupid and slutty? I quote "Tell him we're making out! That will make him mad!.... Oh wait... he will probably like that. HAHAHAHAHAHAH. Do it anyway!" WTF?! I kill you.
Next, Sara starts to bitch because she can't put her feet up on the chair because of the stupid slutty girls below. So we decide to move over to the endish of the row so that we can. Our feet are up there, right? There is quite a bit of seating left. Some people come in and decide, "Hey, lets sit there!" And proceed to move toward our feet chairs. They sit down. I can tell Sara is pissed beyond words. She doesn't take her feet off until the girl is sitting down completely in the seat. Needless to say, we moved up a row and turned our butt seats into our new feet seats.
Finally. This is a R rated movie. So I was shocked when a bunch of fat 6th graders waddled into the theatre. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! 6th graders?! When I was in 6th grade, I was lucky to be watching PG-13 movies, okay? My parents would have NEVER let me see one in theaters. Sure, there were a few that if they watched them and thought they were okay, I could watch them. But NEVER before they had seen them first. What is wrong with you people?! I'm sorry, but some of the stuff that happened in that movie was shocking for ME! And I have seen a lot of shit! There is no way that those kids should have been able to see that movie. They are too young. They probably think they are sex gods now, too. But they aren't. They are still just fat 6th graders with low self esteem and metabolism.
Anyway! Thats my rant for the day. Hope you enjoyed it. Come again soon!
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Love makes me vomit (as does Justin Bieber)
It's everywhere. I literally can't get away from it. It's intoxicating... and not in the good way. Love.
To all you people kissing and groping in public. Knock it the FUCK OFF! IF I WANTED TO WATCH A PORNO I WOULD GO GET ONE! I know that you love each other and you just want everyone to know about it! But you know what else would show that affection to the world? Holding hands. And guess what, there is no tongue involved. Its good for passers by as well as your immune system. And holding hands means ONLY hands. No breasts, crotches, or assholes. We get it. If we wanted to know about your love life we would ask to watch.
To the girl in my English Lit class who gave the kid next to me the stink eye for happening to glance at your breasts. MAYBE DON'T PUT THEM ON DISPLAY THEN YOU LITTLE WHORE! Why do you dress like that?! DO YOU WANT TO GET RAPED?! FOR THE SOUL PURPOSE OF BEING ABLE TO BITCH ABOUT IT?! GAH!
And to you... Justin Bieber... you prepubescent fuck. You do NOT know what love is. You probably can't even get an erection. So STOP SINGING ABOUT IT! You are not a love expert. You are a 12 year old. Focus on your times tables first big guy. You got a ways to go.
I'm just sick of it. Stop shoving it in my face. We get it. Be happy. Tell people you are happy. Then everyone is happy. I don't have to see you have sex in public. I'll believe you if you just say it.
To all you people kissing and groping in public. Knock it the FUCK OFF! IF I WANTED TO WATCH A PORNO I WOULD GO GET ONE! I know that you love each other and you just want everyone to know about it! But you know what else would show that affection to the world? Holding hands. And guess what, there is no tongue involved. Its good for passers by as well as your immune system. And holding hands means ONLY hands. No breasts, crotches, or assholes. We get it. If we wanted to know about your love life we would ask to watch.
To the girl in my English Lit class who gave the kid next to me the stink eye for happening to glance at your breasts. MAYBE DON'T PUT THEM ON DISPLAY THEN YOU LITTLE WHORE! Why do you dress like that?! DO YOU WANT TO GET RAPED?! FOR THE SOUL PURPOSE OF BEING ABLE TO BITCH ABOUT IT?! GAH!
And to you... Justin Bieber... you prepubescent fuck. You do NOT know what love is. You probably can't even get an erection. So STOP SINGING ABOUT IT! You are not a love expert. You are a 12 year old. Focus on your times tables first big guy. You got a ways to go.
I'm just sick of it. Stop shoving it in my face. We get it. Be happy. Tell people you are happy. Then everyone is happy. I don't have to see you have sex in public. I'll believe you if you just say it.
Monday, January 4, 2010
School today and new job!
So, its almost 1 in the morning and I have my first day of classes tomorrow... er, today. And as I sit here watching a re-run of Keeping up with the Kardashian's I can't help but feel overwhelmed for the day that lies ahead of me. After my classes end at 3:30 I have to get ready for my first day at work at 5 at Rosas Pizza in Cheney. I am really excited to have a job, but the first day at a new place is always scary. And I know it will take me a few days to really get to know everyone and get into the groove, but it still causes me to worry. I have to call before class to find out what I need to wear. I need to get a parking permit sometime tomorrow so I don't have to find a parking spot 100 miles away. And I don't know what my work schedule is going to be yet. But I know they close at 1 and 2 in the morning.... so this could cause a problem with my work study job. If I can get enough hours, I won't need that job anymore. But I really am worried about letting my boss Kerri down. So stressed. And not tired at all.
Until next time... beh.
Until next time... beh.
Monday, December 21, 2009
Earbuds in Public
This is what annoys me today.
I went to "Copy Junction" today here in Cheney. As you can probably assume it is a quaint little train themed copy shop. There are two people at the counter, a young woman and a severe looking old woman, with the line growing by the minute. I'm getting bothered already because I have been waiting in line behind ONE guy for 20 minutes. And then I saw it. This kid came in with ear buds in his ear.
This is not the first time this has bothered me because I have seen it before. But already being annoyed and then seeing it just sent me into an internal rage. It's so RUDE! It's one thing to wear them if you are working alone or at your house or on a jog. But in public, where you might be required to speak to someone and act like a functioning human being in society is NOT the place to be wearing these! It just seems so rude to me.
Well thats it for today! Until next time!
I went to "Copy Junction" today here in Cheney. As you can probably assume it is a quaint little train themed copy shop. There are two people at the counter, a young woman and a severe looking old woman, with the line growing by the minute. I'm getting bothered already because I have been waiting in line behind ONE guy for 20 minutes. And then I saw it. This kid came in with ear buds in his ear.
This is not the first time this has bothered me because I have seen it before. But already being annoyed and then seeing it just sent me into an internal rage. It's so RUDE! It's one thing to wear them if you are working alone or at your house or on a jog. But in public, where you might be required to speak to someone and act like a functioning human being in society is NOT the place to be wearing these! It just seems so rude to me.
Well thats it for today! Until next time!
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
One month... I apologize.
Hello everyone! Long time no type! I am SO terribly sorry for the lack of anger since my last post (one month ago). And though there has been a lot of be angry about in that time (lost my job, life in turmoil, bills to pay, angry Christmas shoppers on the road) there are also a lot of things I am happy to report on. Sara Robinson, for all intents and purposes my best friend, has decided to move into the apartment in Cheney with me. In fact, we just co-signed the lease officially today. I am very excited and ready to take on this wild ride for the next 8 months.
BUT! That doesn't mean there isn't something to be angry about. Though, instead of writing about it, there is a video on my Facebook account that I will go ahead and link to this. This will be the first, of many I am sure, videos that will chronicle Sara and I's adventures of living together. I will continue to write on this blog about other things, but I figured these video updates could reside here as well. Enjoy and until next time I am angry, HOPEFULLY SOON!, see you soon!
BUT! That doesn't mean there isn't something to be angry about. Though, instead of writing about it, there is a video on my Facebook account that I will go ahead and link to this. This will be the first, of many I am sure, videos that will chronicle Sara and I's adventures of living together. I will continue to write on this blog about other things, but I figured these video updates could reside here as well. Enjoy and until next time I am angry, HOPEFULLY SOON!, see you soon!
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