Hockey Boys (and sweeping generalizations)

The title says it. I'm just gonna cut the crap on this one. Hockey boys are STUPID! (No offense to any that may be reading this, but if you are, lets be honest, you are too stupid to realize I am making fun of you.) I have yet to meet one who has a brain bigger than Lance Armstrongs one nut.

I am talking about this because there are two kids in my english class that are on the Eastern hockey team. And they are the most retarded unretarded human beings I have ever laid eyes on. There are SO many things wrong with them, that I feel the need to start a list:

1. They think they are comedians. WHICH THEY MOST CERTAINLY ARE NOT! I have yet to hear anything out of their mouths that is remotely funny or even interesting. Mostly just annoying.

2. They smell. No kidding. This is not speculation or me just wishing they smelled bad to make me feel better about doing this. They honest to God smell like a pile of horse manure. Take a damn shower you idiots! We are WAY past this "We don't need deodorant" pre-teen thing. We are adults. We SHOWER now you f**k heads.

3. One of them is writing their research essay on kids that disrupt classes in school........... AM I MISSING SOMETHING HERE?! Is this some sort of sick ironic joke, that you are one of the assholes that disrupt the class with mindless shit that flows out of your mouth?

4. They are ugly. One of them looks like Tyler Wood. Nuf said. This is not me being judgmental, this is merely an observation. Seriously. They both look like they have been beat in the face with an ugly sick once or twice.... or 10 times.

The items listed above seem to be a general requirement for hockey players. I have yet to meet one that wasn't completely illiterate or a douche.

Thanks for reading! Until next time!